Guide card
E4 · The Recipe
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WHYZMEN · OPTIONAL CARD · SESSION 10 WHYZMEN · OPTIONAL CARD · SESSION 10
E4 The Recipe E4 The Recipe
Use it when… planning your friendship week, month and Use it when… planning your friendship week, month and
year. year.
“Let us not give up meeting together … but let us “Let us not give up meeting together … but let us
encourage one another.” encourage one another.”
Hebrews 10:25 Hebrews 10:25
Friendship isn’t luck. It is hours on a calendar. It takes Friendship isn’t luck. It is hours on a calendar. It takes
about 50 hours to make a casual friend, 90 to make a about 50 hours to make a casual friend, 90 to make a
friend, and 200 or more to make a close friend. friend, and 200 or more to make a close friend.
RHYTHM THE TO-DO RHYTHM THE TO-DO
Every week One touch per man in your five: a text, a call, Every week One touch per man in your five: a text, a call,
the porch. Plus one shoulder-to-shoulder the porch. Plus one shoulder-to-shoulder
hour. hour.
Every month Your triad meets. One invitation goes out to Every month Your triad meets. One invitation goes out to
a man in your fifteen. a man in your fifteen.
Every quarter Host one thing for six to twelve men. Every quarter Host one thing for six to twelve men.
Every year Reread your five. Go one rung deeper with Every year Reread your five. Go one rung deeper with
one man. Review your triad charter. one man. Review your triad charter.
A monthly dinner alone takes about eight years to make a A monthly dinner alone takes about eight years to make a
close friend. Add one shared activity in between. close friend. Add one shared activity in between.
E4 · The Recipe (back) E4 · The Recipe (back)
WHAT KEEPS A MAN CLOSE WHAT KEEPS A MAN CLOSE
YOUR… WHO KEEP IN TOUCH YOUR… WHO KEEP IN TOUCH
Five The men you would call at 2 About once a week Five The men you would call at 2 About once a week
a.m. a.m.
Fifteen People whose loss you would About once a Fifteen People whose loss you would About once a
grieve month grieve month
Fifty The cookout, the ball game, About twice a year Fifty The cookout, the ball game, About twice a year
the serve day the serve day
A friendship that doesn’t get its time drifts one layer A friendship that doesn’t get its time drifts one layer
outward within months. outward within months.
MY RECIPE MY RECIPE
My five: ____________________________________ My five: ____________________________________
This week’s touch: __________________________ This week’s touch: __________________________
This month’s invitation: ____________________ This month’s invitation: ____________________
This quarter I will host: ___________________ This quarter I will host: ___________________
THIS SKILL’S PRACTICES S10 Shoulder to shoulder · S13 THIS SKILL’S PRACTICES S10 Shoulder to shoulder · S13
Keep a small promise Keep a small promise
More in the Toolkit: 5 · Build & Host · 6 · Take Stock More in the Toolkit: 5 · Build & Host · 6 · Take Stock
Jeffrey Hall (2019) on the hours friendship takes; Robin Dunbar, Friends (2021); Jeffrey Hall (2019) on the hours friendship takes; Robin Dunbar, Friends (2021);
Kat Vellos, We Should Get Together (2020). Kat Vellos, We Should Get Together (2020).
WhyzMen · Rewire Retirement · Card E4 · r1 · Optional · handed out at Session 10 WhyzMen · Rewire Retirement · Card E4 · r1 · Optional · handed out at Session 10