Guide card
P · Practice of the Week
Show the text version
WHYZMEN · REWIRE RETIREMENT · SESSION 2 TO FIRST FRUITS
Practice of the Week
One skill a week. Try it once. Bring one story to your brothers.
We hope WhyzMen graduates will be known by how they listen, ask and encourage. Skills grow one at a
time, with practice and feedback (Anders Ericsson). Trying it is the practice. Your triad is the feedback.
The card is the menu; the Toolkit is the kitchen. Each practice comes from one of its six skills.
HOW IT WORKS
Each session names one practice. Try it at least once before the next session.
This week: when you have tried it, tick “Tried it ✓” on the back and jot one moment.
In the room: each session opens with “Tell us one moment with this week’s practice.”
This is on the Floor. A missed week is not a failure. Pick it up tomorrow.
When Practice How Toolkit skill
Ask the second Before you tell your own story, ask one follow-up about theirs.
S2 2 · Ask
question Rooted in: Alison Wood Brooks, Harvard
When they stop talking, wait two beats. Then speak.
S3 Let them finish 1 · Listen
Rooted in: James 1:19
Ask about her day before you tell yours, and stay with her answer.
S4 Her day first 4 · At Home
Rooted in: Gottman: turning toward
“Tell me about a time when…” Then listen for the turning point.
S5 Ask for a story 2 · Ask
Rooted in: David Brooks
“What I heard you say is…” in their words, before your own.
S6 Reflect it back 1 · Listen
Rooted in: The Session 6 witness
Name the value Tell someone which value you see them living, and where. 3 · Speak Truly &
S7
you see Rooted in: Your Values Compass Encourage
When someone runs himself down, hear it, turn it over, hand it back. 3 · Speak Truly &
S8 The Barnabas Turn
Rooted in: Acts 4:36 · Clifton Encourage
Tell her (or someone) one good thing from today and how it came
Three Good
S9 about. 4 · At Home
Things, aloud
Rooted in: Martin Seligman
Shoulder to Invite a man to do something side by side.
S10 5 · Build & Host
shoulder Rooted in: Dunbar; Session 10
Call a man you have not heard from. Ask the second question.
Break One call a week 6 · Take Stock
Rooted in: The Wilderness Between
Ask what you do not know the answer to. No advice with a question
Honest, open
S11 mark. 2 · Ask
questions
Rooted in: Parker Palmer
Share one true thing you would usually keep back. 3 · Speak Truly &
S12 One level deeper
Rooted in: Arthur Aron Encourage
Keep a small Make one small promise this week and keep it on time.
S13 5 · Build & Host
promise Rooted in: Luke 16:10
Tell someone, specifically, what they have meant to you. 3 · Speak Truly &
S14 Say the blessing
Rooted in: Legacy & Letters Encourage
Choose your Circle the one or two that became yours. Tell your triad why. 6 · Take Stock (all
S15
keepers Rooted in: Philippians 4:9 six)
WhyzMen · Rewire Retirement | Practice of the Week r4 | page 1
THE PRACTICE THAT HOLDS THE OTHERS
The Barnabas Turn
“Joseph, whom the apostles called Barnabas, which means son of encouragement.” Acts 4:36
1 · Hear it Let it land first. “That sounds hard.” A quick silver lining feels like dismissal.
2 · Turn it over Name the strength, lesson or next step underneath, in his own words.
3 · Hand it back End with a question, not a verdict: “Where could that help someone this week?”
When you run yourself down, ask the same three. Then ask your triad what they
4 · Turn it on yourself
see.
My week-by-week tracker
When you have tried it once this week, tick the box. Jot one moment for your triad.
When Practice Tried ✓ One moment
S2 Ask the second question
S3 Let them finish
S4 Her day first
S5 Ask for a story
S6 Reflect it back
S7 Name the value you see
S8 The Barnabas Turn
S9 Three Good Things, aloud
S10 Shoulder to shoulder
Break 1 One call a week
Break 2 〃
Break 3 〃
S11 Honest, open questions
S12 One level deeper
S13 Keep a small promise
S14 Say the blessing
S15 Choose your keepers
After Session 15, go round the card again, keeping the one or two that became yours.
“Encourage one another daily, as long as it is called ‘Today.’” Hebrews 3:13
WhyzMen · Rewire Retirement | Practice of the Week r4 | page 2